A hen party is the bride’s last celebration before the wedding, usually organised by her friends, sisters or maid of honour. Today it does not have to be a loud night out: it can be a spa day, a workshop, a photoshoot or a weekend away. Here is how to plan a hen party, which formats suit different brides, which games to play and what to give.
More on this topic: hen party wishes, wedding invitation wording, dress codes.
In Ukrainian it is дівич-вечір, hyphenated (the Russian word is “девичник”). In English it is a bachelorette party in the US or a hen party / hen do in the UK. The tradition has old roots: in the Ukrainian wedding ritual the дівич-вечір was held the night before the church wedding, when friends wove a wreath, sang ritual songs and bid farewell to the bride’s maidenhood. Today’s party keeps the essence — a warm send-off from single life among friends.
Traditionally the maid of honour or the bride’s closest friend organises the party, sometimes a sister. The bride can share wishes about the format and guest list, but details are best kept a surprise. Costs are usually split evenly among guests and the bride does not pay — it is the friends’ gift. If the plan is expensive (a trip, spa or rented house), agree the budget in advance so nobody feels awkward.
Who organises it. Traditionally the maid of honour or the closest friend, but a small team of two or three works better. The bride can help plan or find out everything at the last minute — ask her in advance which she prefers.
When. Two to four weeks before the wedding, not the night before: the bride needs time to rest and should not worry about how she will feel on her big day. Saturday works best, so everyone can sleep in on Sunday.
Budget. Agree on the amount up front: guests usually split the costs and the bride does not pay for herself. Make a spreadsheet and collect contributions in advance so nobody feels awkward.
Invitations and dress code. Send invitations three weeks ahead with the date, plan and dress code — for example, everyone in pink while the bride wears white with a veil and a “Bride” sash. See wording ideas in wedding invitation wording.For more party planning guides, see how to plan a party.
Send invitations 3–4 weeks ahead: date, time, place, format and dress code, the contribution, the organiser’s contact and a reminder to keep the secret. Sample wording:
Relaxed. 1) A spa or hammam day with massages and face masks. 2) A studio photoshoot with a veil, flowers and bubbly. 3) A pyjama party at home with wedding films. 4) A workshop: floristry, pottery, candle-making or cocktails. 5) A picnic in a garden or park with a flower arch.
Lively. 6) A yacht or boat trip. 7) An escape room or karaoke. 8) A dance class, from Latin to burlesque. 9) A weekend in another city or a country house. 10) A restaurant party with a themed dress code.
Choose the format for the bride, not for the trend: if she dislikes being the centre of attention, a cosy evening with her closest friends is the best gift. For toasts and wishes, see hen party wishes.
“How well do you know the groom?” Ask the groom ten questions in advance (favourite food, where the first date was), film his answers and let the bride guess. “Whose story is it?” Friends anonymously write funny stories about the bride, and she guesses who wrote each one.
Toilet-paper dress. Teams have ten minutes to make a wedding dress out of toilet paper or napkins on one of the friends. Five-minute bouquet. Each guest arranges a mini bouquet from prepared flowers, and the bride picks the best. Time capsule. Friends write letters to the bride to open on her first wedding anniversary.
Small, thoughtful gifts suit a hen party: silk pyjamas for the wedding morning, a spa voucher, a photo album of your memories or a scented candle. A bouquet in soft tones will brighten the photo corner and remind her that the most beautiful day is just ahead.
See peonies and wedding flowers.
Ideally two to four weeks before. Avoid the night before: the bride needs rest and sleep.
Usually friends split the costs equally and cover the bride’s share.
“Дівич-вечір”, written with a hyphen.
A pyjama party, a film night, a workshop with a visiting instructor, games like “How well do you know the groom?” and a photo corner with flowers and balloons.
A picnic or house party, spa day, workshop (flower crowns, cocktails, pottery), photo shoot, escape room, karaoke, a weekend away or a restaurant dinner with games.
Author: Maria Svitlovir
Graduated from Taras Shevchenko National University of Kyiv, Institute of Biology and Medicine (2001). BSc in Biology, MSc in Horticulture. Writes about plants, works at a garden centre selecting and repotting plants, and contributes to plant reference guides.
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