Wedding Flowers for Guests: What to Give the Newlyweds

In Ukraine guests often arrive at a wedding with flowers — and by the end of the evening the bride has a mountain of bouquets and nowhere to put them. For your gift to delight rather than cause trouble, think ahead about format, colour and timing. Here is which flowers are appropriate for wedding guests to give, how to match a bouquet to the style of the celebration and which alternatives the couple may appreciate even more.

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Should guests bring flowers at all

The tradition of giving flowers to the bride is common in Ukraine and neighbouring countries, whereas in Western Europe and the US guests usually come without bouquets and flowers are handled by the florist. If the couple has asked for no flowers or suggested an alternative — a voucher or a charity donation, for example — it's best to respect that.

If flowers are appropriate, remember that the couple is busy on the day, and dozens of bouquets often wilt without water in the venue or the car. So the format matters as much as the flowers.

Which format to choose

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• Arrangement in a box or basket — the flowers sit in wet floral foam and need no vase. It's easy to take home and lasts several days.
• Classic bouquet — compact, in a light palette, neatly wrapped. Large bouquets are awkward to hold and store.
• Potted plant — an orchid, anthurium or peace lily becomes a keepsake for years.
• Flowers later — arrange delivery the day after the wedding or when the couple returns from their honeymoon, so your flowers don't get lost among the rest.

Which flowers and colours to choose

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The classic choice is white, cream and pastel shades: roses, lisianthus, peonies, hydrangeas, alstroemerias and freesia. They suit almost any wedding style and symbolise tenderness and purity. If you know the wedding palette, echo it in your bouquet — a thoughtful touch. For an autumn wedding, warm tones and berries work well; see autumn wedding ideas.

What to avoid:

• Strongly scented flowers — lilies, hyacinths, tuberoses: in a room full of bouquets the scent becomes overwhelming.
• Lilies with anthers — the pollen stains dresses. If you want lilies, ask the florist to remove the anthers.
• Oversized, heavy arrangements — hard to hold and transport.
• Dark, sombre tones, unless the couple chose them for their wedding.

A few simple rules

1. Give the flowers with your gift when congratulating the couple, not in the crowd at the entrance.
2. Add a signed card so the newlyweds know who the flowers are from.
3. Numbers. In Ukrainian tradition an odd number of flowers is given for celebrations when a bouquet has fewer than 15 stems.
4. Coordinate with other guests — you can club together for one striking arrangement instead of many small bouquets.
5. Don't compete with the bridal bouquet — your gift shouldn't resemble it in size or style. See our bridal bouquet guide.

Frequently asked questions

Which flowers should I give at a wedding?

White or pastel roses, lisianthus, peonies, hydrangeas or alstroemerias, in a compact bouquet or a box arrangement.

Can I give red roses at a wedding?

Yes, they symbolise love, but pair them with white flowers so the bouquet looks festive and gentle.

Do guests have to bring flowers to a wedding?

No. If the couple has asked for no flowers, it's best to follow their wishes.

How can I stop my bouquet wilting at the wedding?

Choose an arrangement in floral foam or have the flowers delivered the next day.

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Author: Maria Svitlovir

Graduated from Taras Shevchenko National University of Kyiv, Institute of Biology and Medicine (2001). BSc in Biology, MSc in Horticulture. Writes about plants, works at a garden centre selecting and repotting plants, and contributes to plant reference guides.